Not My Intention
by HPfanonezillion
Summary: Sydney never meant for this to become a regular thing. She just wanted to explore a little, knowing Adrian would give her what she asked. But it's been weeks and it's still happening. And neither feels the need to stop any time soon.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's note: This was originally going to be a one-shot, but the characters thought differently. lol. There probably will only be two or three more. It's all fluff. I switch between Sydney's first-person perspective and Adrian's third-person. I don't know if it will happen in the other chapters, but I felt like I needed to have Adrian's perspective here._

_The title comes from the Katy Perry song I Kissed Girl, in case you were wondering. Please feel free to review and let me know what you think.  
_

_Happy reading!  
_

_Edit: To the anonymous guest and _it makes sense in context_, thank you for pointing out that I had Sydney's eye color wrong. I couldn't find it online, so I looked at the cover and she appears to have blue eyes. I have it fixed now. Thanks again!_

Not My Intention

A Bloodlines (Sydrian) Fanfiction

By Danielle Cheri

Chapter One

I don't know how exactly it happened that I came to be lying on Adrian's ugly yellow couch with him stretched over me, but I was. After a long day of school and then conjuring for Miss Terwilliger, I was exhausted and not in the mood to be on campus.

So I got into Latte without much of a word to Jill or the others. Jill would know soon enough because I _knew_ where I was going; I just didn't want to admit it consciously. But I was drawn to him. I had missed the feel of his lips against mine. The feel of his body close to mine.

Admittedly, this wasn't the first time. I'd been sneaking to his place for weeks. But it had been several days since our last encounter. Jill had been looking at me longingly for a while, so I knew he was missing me just as much as I missed him.

It was, in a way, like he was a drug I was addicted to. I had never had my body react this way. I had never had these feelings. And it scared me.

He kissed me smoothly. His tongue lightly slip over my lips and I tentatively opened my mouth. I had never kissed anyone this way. I liked it. His hands slid over my body, but on top of my clothes. He trailed kisses across my jaw and down my neck. My hands tangled in his hair and pulled his mouth back to mine. He kissed me thoroughly.

After a while, I pushed him away gently, rubbing my thumbs over his cheekbones. He smiled down at me and kissed me softly one more time before he sat up. He ran his fingers through his unruly hair and looked away as I sat up and righted my blouse.

"So how was your day?" He asked when I was put back together.

I shrugged and curled into his side. "Long."

"What about with Terwilliger?"

I sighed and pulled away. "I don't come here to talk magic."

"No, you just come here to make it." He said, pulling me back into his side and kissing my hair.

I chuckled and pressed my eyes into his neck. "If that's what you want to call it."

He laughed. "So how is Jill?"

"In need of the feeder. She's dragging, but it's not until tomorrow."

"It's hard."

"Well, your better moods help, you know."

"Many thanks to you, Sydney." He said softly, running his fingertips down my arm and back up again slowly.

I sat up and looked at him. "I like when you call me Sydney."

"I like saying it." He brushed his lips across mine and then stood. He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and tapped one out.

"I wish you would quit that." I said softly as he lit up.

He blew out the smoke, but at least had the decency to look ashamed. "I've quit drinking." He took a drag and then spoke again as he let the smoke out again, "And I've cut back on this, thank you very much." He walked into the kitchen and retrieved two cans from the fridge. He came back in and handed me one.

I let out a feigned cough as he moved to sit down beside me. He paused and stubbed out the cigarette, but not so much that he couldn't light it up again once I was gone. He turned his head and blew out the smoke in the other direction. He moved in to try and kiss me again, but I put a hand on his chest.

"Not when you taste like an ash tray." I warned.

He pushed me back and forced a playful kiss on me anyway.

I laughed, despite myself and took a long drink from my diet pop. I sat it on the coffee table and said, "So."

"So." He said back, taking a drink from something obviously full of calories and caffeine.

"Has Jill…?" I didn't even know why I was asking.

"She's asked about it, but she knows pretty much everything. We've been working on her ability to block me out."

"She doesn't say anything to me about it. But we're usually around everyone else, so…"

"She wants to help us keep our secret. If Angeline ever found out…"

"Not to mention we're supposed to be related around here." I turned Adrian hand over on his lap and started drawing circles on his palm with my forefinger. "I need to go."

"Yeah."

"You don't hate that I don't want to rush this, do you?" I asked uncertainly.

He closed his hand around mine and squeezed it gently. "I know you like me. But you don't love me. You're attracted to me." He turned my face up and looked into my eyes. "You're not still scared of me, are you?"

I felt the corners of my mouth tugging in a smile, "As long as you keep your magic to yourself."

"That's it. And your dad is one of the foremost Alchemists. Not to mention you still work for that organization. If we go any farther that just the occasional make-out session, we could both get too attached and mess up."

"I already _have_ messed up, Adrian." I pressed my lips to his hard. I pulled away after a few seconds. "I never should have taken this job." I got up and headed for the door.

"Hey, Sage." He called, bounding after me.

I turned as I pulled my coat on. "Yes?"

He raised his hand and slid a finger down my cheek. "I like that you want to take this slow. I'm not usually very cautious. And, not that I wouldn't wait forever, but I want to make sure Jill can completely block me out before we go any farther than kissing. She doesn't need to see that." He smirked and his eyes drifted down my body. "_I_ want to, but she doesn't need to."

I felt a blush creeping up my cheeks. "I agree." I said softly. I raised myself up on my toes and brushed a kiss across his lips. "I'll see you tomorrow for our trip to Clarence's house."

He put his hand over his heart and said dramatically, "I will wait with bated breath."

I chuckled as he kissed me one more time.

He pulled my coat closed and fastened the buttons. "It's getting cold out there, Sage."

I rested my hand on his cheek for a moment before I left without another word.

My phone went off with a text as I buckled myself into Latte. It was from Adrian. "_I know it's cheesy, but I miss you already._"

I sent back. "_Don't be so sentimental. You'll see me tomorrow._" Then I immediately sent, "_Oh, and I feel the same way. We're the cheese twins._"

"_Twin Powers activate! Lol. Be careful driving, Sage._"

I looked out the window as I turned over the ignition to see him standing in the doorway. He waved and I waved back before I drove away.

* * *

"_Stop being so weird._" Jill texted Adrian.

He smiled at the words she wrote and replied, "_Stop looking in on my private conversations._"

"_Can't really help it. Too tired._"

"_It's late. Go to bed._"

"_Homework. Someone was making it hard to concentrate._"

"_I have no idea what you're talking about, kid._"

"_Sure. Just ask her out already._"

Adrian stared at the message from his Spirit-bonded friend for almost a minute before he answered, "_Too dangerous._"

"_Then family movie night out and you sit with her. I'll keep everyone else distracted._"

"_I'll talk to Sage about it. Goodnight._"

After getting Jill's response, he plugged in his phone and stood in front of a blank canvas. He started mixing paints on a palette and started painting. He didn't know really what he was painting until it was done and he was looking at a close-up of Sydney's golden brown eyes. There was nothing else. She had become his favorite subject lately: her eyes, her mouth, her nose. Portraits and abstractions galore. And mostly from memory; she never let him use her as a live model. Though, he never had gotten the courage to ask.

Adrian sighed and brought his brushes to the sink to wash out. His phone rang in the middle of the process. "Sage!" He said when he answered it.

She chuckled on the other end. "What happened to Sydney?"

"What happened to you keeping your distance?"

"I just wanted to talk to you one last time before I went to bed."

"Admit that you can't live without me." He demanded kindly.

"I can, actually." She paused. "Jill said something about family movie night? Said it was your idea."

"Did she?"

"Yeah, but she said you…might want to…I mean…"

"She suggested it as a date for us. It was her idea."

"Ah."

"If you don't want to, we don't have to." Why was he suddenly nervous? He was never nervous. Well, that was until he fell for Sydney. She had so much to lose. He did too, but he had survived a broken heart once before and could do it again if he had to. She could lose her job and be sent to "re-education." Just the name made him uncomfortable.

"I'd like to. We can talk about it tomorrow." She said, breaking into his thoughts.

"Good. I know I'll be much clearer with blood in my system." He stopped short as he heard her sharp intake of breath. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine." She said quickly. "It's who you are."

"I wish it wasn't." He said softly.

"You can't help it, Adrian. It's like me wishing I didn't have brown eyes and blonde hair."

He stepped in front of his new painting at the mention of her eyes. "Yeah." He said softly.

"I need to get some sleep."

"Yeah, me too." He paused. "I'll see you tomorrow, Sydney."

"Tomorrow." She promised before they disconnected.

* * *

I had trouble sleeping that night. Thoughts of Adrian kept me tossing and rethinking my decisions. I didn't want to be attracted to him, but I was. And I kept going over there and kissing him and letting him touch me so tenderly, like I was fragile.

I dozed off near morning and cursed at my alarm when it went off just over an hour later. I got up and got ready for my day. With the knowledge and anticipation of seeing Adrian later, I felt better as I headed to breakfast.

Jill commented when I sat down with her, Eddie, and Angeline, "You look bright and chipper this morning." She gave me a significant look.

"Really? I didn't get much sleep last night." I commented as I bit into my apple.

"So, I was thinking." Jill said to the entire group, changing the subject before anyone got suspicious, and then proceeded to go on with her idea for the "family" outing. "I was thinking Saturday night. I have a study group Friday."

"I can do Saturday." Eddie said, biting into his scrambled eggs.

"Me too." Angeline said. For once she wasn't in trouble and confined to the dorms.

"Sydney?" Jill asked.

I felt myself smile. "Yeah, that sounds like a good plan. I'll say something to Adrian."

"Why would you be the one to talk to Adrian?" Angeline asked.

I felt words of defense try to form on my tongue, but Jill answered for me. "My phone is acting up. Not working half the time. And since the bond only goes one way…" She spooned cereal into her mouth with a shrug. "Thanks for having my back on that front, Sydney."

"Yeah, no problem. We'll work on getting your phone fixed." I assured her and smiled gratefully.

The day passed in a blur. I already knew all this stuff. I just had to keep my grades up so I could stay until we knew Jill was safe to go back to her normal life.

We loaded up in Latte and I sent a text to Adrian to tell him we were on our way. His response came while I was driving. I asked Jill to look at it, but she said, "Better wait and do it yourself."

"You already know what it says?"

"No, but I know the emotion behind it, so it's best if you let it stay private." She said as softly as possible so the others didn't hear.

Jill jumped out and scooted into the back seat as soon as I pulled up in front of Adrian's apartment. He smiled gratefully at her and slid into the front seat as I read his message. "_Hurry! I've been anxious to see you all day._"

I looked over and smiled at him. "Hey." I said as I put the car in gear and headed out of town.

"Hey." He said back.

I heard Jill in the back seat, taking over conversation with the others and distracting them.

I softly said, "I like the text, but we really need to be more careful."

"I know. I just couldn't help myself." He reached over the bench seat and squeezed my leg briefly before putting his hand in the middle of the seat, inviting me to hold it.

I wish I could have.

Jill hurried inside once we arrived. Eddie and Angeline followed.

I tried to get out, but Adrian stopped me with a hand on my arm. I turned to look at him, but was met with his lips moving gently against mine.

"When do I get to be alone with you again?" He asked, his voice husky.

"Well, I don't know about alone, but what do you say to a date Saturday? Family movie night out."

"I like that. Can I hold your hand since it'll be dark?"

"Sure." I got out of the car before I kissed him again.


	2. Chapter 2

_Author's note: Thank you so much for all the adds to follow this and favorite it and for the reviews. I hope you all continue to like this. Please keep all that coming!_

_And I would like to thank the anonymous guest and_ it makes sense in context_ for pointing out that I originally had Sydney's__ eye color wrong. It is now fixed. If you find any more mistakes, please feel free to point them out as it's been quite a while since I read _The Golden Lily.

_Anyway, happy reading!  
_

Chapter Two

I stared at my reflection in my mirror. I had changed twice, but I only owned the same dull clothes. Normally I liked them, they fit and they were easy to replace if they were ever damaged, but lately it was different. I wanted to look good for Adrian. Not that that mattered. This wasn't officially a date as far as everyone else was concerned.

I smoothed my hand once more over the light blue blouse that I had settled on. Though it was a good color on me, I still worried about how I looked. I knew I looked as good as I was ever going to look. And Adrian seemed to like it. I picked up my purse from beside the door. I flexed my fingers as I walked down to meet everyone in the lobby. My hand ached to be held by his. And my lips tingled at the memory of our shared kisses.

I put those thoughts out of my head as I stepped off the last step. Jill smiled and waved when she saw me.

"Adrian's getting anxious. I told him we'd be there soon." She explained.

"Well, text him and say we're on our way." I said as I led everyone out to Latte.

It was already dark. The earlier nights increased the fear I was so good at pushing away these days. I was still concerned for our safety, but since we were all out in a group, and Adrian and I had been taking the self-defense classes, I wasn't as bad as I would have been in the past. Not to mention we had a skilled guardian in our midst. And Jill and Angeline were making a lot of progress in their own training.

Adrian was waiting for us when I pulled up. Jill again obediently moved to sit in the back when he walked up.

"Good evening, all." He said jovially as he closed the door. "How was your Saturday?"

Everyone mumbled that their day was good. Mine was filled with worry for the evening. I said nothing.

Adrian's hand slid across the seat and rested on my knee in the darkness.

"Stop." I said, barely above a whisper.

"Don't be so uptight, Sage." He murmured before he removed his hand.

Jill kept up most of the chatter. Adrian brushed his fingertips over my thigh, making me blush. I whispered again for him to stop. He did, moving to stare out the window. I focused on the road.

"Hey, Sage, could you spot me?" He asked softly as we walked to the box office.

"I guess." I said with a sigh, pulling my wallet out of my purse.

"You pay for me this time and I'll try to pay next time." He promised.

"You already owe me a lot." I pointed out.

"Hey, isn't this supposed to be a date?"

"On a traditional date, the guy pays."

"Well, this guy is a little strapped for cash because Mommy's in prison and Daddy blames me."

I shook my head and stepped forward, ordering our tickets to the agreed-upon movie. Angeline and Eddie had wanted something full of action and explosions. Jill had requested something lighter, maybe a romance. Adrian and I said we could care less. But we finally came to the compromise of a drama.

"Do you want popcorn or anything?" I asked, sure he was going to beg me for it anyway.

"How about you and I share a tub of large popcorn?" He leaned in and whispered, "So our fingers can brush occasionally."

"Shut up, already." I said, shoving his shoulder. "You're supposed to be my brother."

"Really? Because I'm having some very un-brotherly thoughts about you."

Ignoring him once more, I stepped up to the concession stand and ordered the popcorn and a diet pop. "And whatever he wants to drink." I motioned to Adrian standing right behind me.

He requested, "What she's having."

I hid my shock and passed over my money.

"Do you think I have time to go out for a smoke?" Adrian asked as we finally made our way into our appointed theater.

Eddie looked down at his watch and said. "Movie starts in ten minutes."

"Perfect amount of time." He shoved the popcorn at me and turned to head out the door with his drink in his hand.

We took a seat near the back of the theater. There was already a couple making out heavily in the last row. We sat near the aisle, Jill saved a seat for Adrian between her and me. Eddie and Angeline sat on the other side of her. We all talked as we watched the before-movie trivia. None of us were really big on pop culture, having been so sheltered in our respective lives, but it was fun to try and figure out all the ridiculous things asked.

My phone went off and I looked down to see Adrian was calling.

"So, I'm the idiot who didn't get his ticket from his girlfriend before taking his smoke break."

"Don't use that word, please." I said as I stood. I told Jill, "Be right back, I have Adrian's ticket."

"Which word? Idiot?" he asked.

"No, I don't mind you using that word. I often find you are an idiot."

"Ah, so you object to me claiming you're my girlfriend?"

"Yes. Because I'm not. We are very far from that step."

"No, you just come over to my house and make out with me."

I stepped out into the night and ended the conversation. I spotted Adrian a few feet away, still shrouded in smoke.

"I need to start carrying fabric refresher in my purse." I said as I stepped over to him, waving the air in front of me.

"Don't worry, I got it covered." He ran around in circles, waving his arms around like a windmill.

I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled out of my chest at the ridiculous sight. I bit my lip and looked away.

Then he stopped and pulled a bottle from his pocket and spritzed it onto his shirt. He walked over to me. "Sniff me." He demanded.

"No, I think I'm good." I said, backing away.

"Smell me. Do I still smell like smoke?"

"Adrian, the movie is starting."

"I'm not moving from this spot until you sniff me and tell me I smell like the grass after a spring rain."

"Fine." I said. I stepped forward and took a quick whiff. "You don't smell so cloyingly like smoke that I can't sit beside you for the next two hours. Now, come on." I held out his ticket. "Dark theater, remember?"

His smiled grew seductive and he snatched his ticket out of my hand and picked up his drink from the ground. "Ah, yes."

We took our seats after the lights went down. Jill whispered to Adrian that she had to fight off the people trying to steal our empty seats despite the popcorn tub sitting in one seat and the dink in the cup holder of the other.

"Thanks, Jill." He said.

I saw her lean over and whisper in his ear and then he chuckled and reached into the bucket in my lap. He popped the kernels in his mouth and then leaned over and whispered, "Jill said she almost gave our seats away so we'd have to find other seats."

I smiled and rested my arm on the armrest between us. "There are still eyes everywhere." I whispered back.

He slipped his hand into mine and rested it on his lap. We didn't say anything else the entire time. I shifted in my seat and put the popcorn tub on his lap to hide our hands a little better. If I knew it wouldn't be obvious, I would have rested my head on his shoulder. He actually smelled really nice. It was a spicy, yet soft scent that tickled my nose and made me want to bury my face in his neck.

But I restrained myself, reaching over to snag popcorn to distract myself. He ended up timing it just right so that our fingers brushed more than once. His curled his index finger around mine and we shared a smile before he released me and let me eat the last of the popcorn.

The movie ended and the credits started rolling. I squeezed Adrian's hand quickly just before I removed mine and shifted away.

As we shuffled out with everyone, Adrian ended up pressed close to my back. He leaned down and whispered in my ear, "I haven't had a chance to tell you that you look really pretty tonight."

I hid my smile and kept walking.

Adrian and I ended up outside before everyone else. He pulled me outside and around to the dark alley between buildings. He gently pushed me against the wall and pressed close to me. "Drop them off and then come back."

"Here?" I asked with a teasing smile.

"If you want." He brushed a quick kiss over my lips and then stepped back. "I hear Jill."

"Because she knows what's going on and is warning us." I stepped away and around the corner into the crowd just as Eddie, Angeline, and Jill broke through.

"I'm starved." Angeline announced. "Can we go to a diner or something?"

"I could go for desert. How about Pies and Stuff?" Adrian suggested.

"That depends." I said.

"On what, Sage?" He challenged.

"How much of my money you want me to spend tonight."

"Come on, Sydney. It's not like you don't have it. Don't go to the coffee shop a few times this week."

"Don't." I said before we could get into an argument. "Fine. Pies and Stuff." I led the way back to Latte and keyed it open.

Adrian leaned over the seat and murmured, "Sorry, I didn't mean that like it sounded."

"I know." I patted his hand before I started the car and drove toward the dessert shop.


	3. Chapter 3

_Author's note: Thank you all for the reviews and adding this to your favorites and follows. You are all greatly appreciated. Feel free to keep them coming. And to the anon who pointed out that Adrian does have money, I explain that in this chapter._

_Happy reading!_

Chapter Three

Pies and Stuff was not very full. We took a seat in the back. Eddie sat in the corner where he could watch the entire restaurant and be able to get up if needed.

"I thought you had money again." I mumbled to Adrian as Angeline took over the conversation, telling some animated tale about her life back home with the Keepers.

"Yeah, well, I've had a bit of a setback. I had to buy art supplies and pay tuition and rent. And…other things which I can't tell you about because they are matters of national security." He smirked and picked up the menu. "I still have a little. But not much. I wouldn't have been able to get into the movie without you. I have all of four bucks cash to my name."

"Order your own pie then." I said, sitting back in my chair.

"Only if you share it with me."

"I don't eat pie."

"You don't eat anything." He said. "You need to eat something."

"I'm fine. I ate a lot of popcorn."

"Come on, Sage. Do this for me."

"I'm not hungry, Adrian."

"A cup of coffee, then? It's only a dollar. And I'll get a small slice of apple pie, nothing fancy. Let me pay you back."

"Pay me back? A dollar for a cup of coffee is paying me back? It was ten bucks to get you into that movie. And the soda was four."

"Not to mention the popcorn was also four." He said, putting down the menu. "I'm not hungry after all." He stood. "I need a cigarette."

"I thought you were cutting back." I challenged.

"Heightened emotions make me crave it more. And since I quit drinking…" He turned without another word.

I tried to focus on the conversation, but I couldn't. I waved off the waitress when she asked for my order. I got up and followed Adrian outside.

He stood in the shadows, the glowing end of his clove cigarette the only indication he was there.

"Adrian." I said softly as I walked toward him.

"I'm sorry." He said just as quietly, flicking ashes. He took another drag and made a show of blowing smoke in the opposite direction from where I stood. "I, um…I never meant to make you mad, Sydney."

I leaned against the wall beside him. "I'm not mad, Adrian." I slipped my hand into his in the shadows between us. "I just want…" I shook my head and pressed my eyes into his shoulder.

He turned his head and kissed the top of my hair. "I'll fix it. I've been planning on it. That's where most of my money is tied up."

I lifted my head to look at him in shock.

"You're always working so hard, Sydney. I want to send you away for a weekend. You can go home to see your mom and sisters or fly them closer. I know you miss them."

"Adrian, I…I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything. Just choose how you want to do it. I'll pull my strings. And I know I can get Jill to help. She _is_ the vampire queen's sister, after all."

I laughed and squeezed his hand. I wanted to kiss him, but in such a public place, we were risking enough just holding hands. I stepped away. "I want to talk about this some more. Are you sure?"

"You deserve it, Sydney. More than anyone. You throw your whole self into everything, even when you don't have to. It's one of the things I like most about you." He ran a finger down my arm. "Come over and we can talk about it some more."

"You just want to kiss me." I teased in a low voice.

He gave me a cocky grin. "I won't deny that. I've wanted to do it all night."

I turned away and walked back inside. Adrian was only a few steps behind me. If only our lives were different, I'd reach back and hold his hand and never let go for the rest of the night.

Adrian ordered a slice of pie as soon as he sat down. "Two forks, please. And a cup of coffee for the lady."

I looked away, trying to hide my blush. "I'm paying for it." I told him before taking a sip of the coffee.

"No, I can get this." He promised, holding out the extra fork to me. "I want you to eat at least a quarter of this. That's not _too_ many calories." He brought a forkful to his mouth and chewed slowly.

I felt the eyes of our three companions on me. I took three bites and forced myself to stop. If I ate one more, I wouldn't be able to stop.

* * *

I dropped Adrian off and then drove the rest of us back to Amberwood. I went up to my room as everyone else did. My phone went off and I checked it. Adrian.

"_Are you coming back over tonight? I know you have a curfew._"

"_Yeah, I do. But it's still an hour away._"

"_Then come over. Please?_"

"_On my way._"

I went back downstairs and was able to leave without anyone stopping me to ask where I was going and when I was coming back. I could make it to Adrian's in just a few minutes. I didn't have much time, but I'd take what I could get.

He opened the door for me and pressed me against it the moment it was closed behind me. My breath rushed out of my lungs and right into his mouth as he pressed it to mine. I wrapped my arms around him, feeling secure in the feel of his body pressed against mine. It really did feel right. And his mouth fit over mine better than I would have ever thought. His fangs never grazed me, something for which I was most grateful.

All too soon, he stepped away with an embarrassed chuckle. "Sorry."

"Don't apologize for that." I said breathlessly, smoothing a hand down the front of his shirt.

He smiled and brushed a far more chaste kiss across my lips. He backed away. "I could have at least said hello before I attacked you."

"I'll gladly be attacked like that by you any day." I grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the couch. I draped my legs over his and kissed his cheek. "So this vacation?"

"You're just using me for that now, aren't you?" He teased, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

"No, of course not." I kissed him on the lips this time. "But it's a nice incentive."

He chuckled and gently pushed me onto my back. "I like when you use big words." He rained soft kisses over my face and neck.

I slid my hands over his back and into his hair. I like the way his mouth felt on me, but I liked even more the way it felt when our mouths were moving together. I pulled his face back up and murmured, "Kiss me, Adrian."

He did. Softly, no tongue or teeth, just lips. He pushed himself up and looked down at me. "I'm going to confess something to you."

"What?"

"It's going to freak you out. Maybe you'll leave."

"Maybe. Tell me anyway."

He sighed and sat back. "I really wish I could bite you."

My heart sped up in the fear he knew I'd have. I sat up and moved away, preparing myself to run.

"I'm sorry. It's just…When a guy is with a girl he finds attractive…well, it's all normal biology for the most part. Except for me being Moroi. I crave blood. And it's taboo for it to happen during sex, but I want it."

"Have you done it before?" I asked, my eyes darting around the room, looking for the quickest way out.

"Yeah." He stood and pulled out his cigarettes. He looked at the pack and me and then sat it on the coffee table. "With Rose. But we didn't ever actually have sex. We almost did…I drank her blood instead."

I watched him pace around the room, my fear melting away. "Adrian, it goes against everything I believe in."

"I know." He said softly. He turned back around. "You should probably get back. It's late."

I nodded and stood. I walked around to stand in front of him. I placed my hands on his face. "Are you okay?"

"Sydney, I like you. I really like you. I haven't felt this way except for her."

"I know."

"I don't want to hurt you. You are dyed in the wool alchemist. If this ever gets out, your career is over before it even completely starts."

"Maybe it would be good. I'd never have to hear my father put me down. I could have the job I want."

"Mechanic or architect?" he asked kindly.

"Both." I said with a smile.

"You'd have that 're-education' more likely. And you'd remember why you should be scared of me just by looking at me, not when I say I want to drink your blood in the heat of passion." He pushed my hands away. "You really need to go."

"Do you need blood?" I asked, my voice faltering over the last word.

"I'm fine." He assured me.

"You sure?"

"I am." He kissed me. "Sorry."

"Me too." I sighed and placed my hands on his chest, splaying my fingers. "I wish I could stay."

He put his hands on top of mine. "Yeah." He kissed me again. "You better get going before I pull you back over to the couch and kiss you until we're breathless."

I smiled. "I wish I could. Maybe I'll come over tomorrow first thing and stay all day."

"You never got to tell you about the vacation. What would you like to happen?"

"I'd like to go home, but only if I know my father isn't there. I want to spend time with my mom and sisters without him. If you have the connections, you can make that happen."

"I'll do my best." He brushed his fingers down my cheek. "I'll miss you."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

Adrian's phone went off and he reached for it as I headed for the door. "It's Jill. She says that she and I have plans tomorrow."

"Yeah, I think you two need some time to work on that block thing." I kissed him once more and then left quite reluctantly.


	4. Chapter 4

_Author's notes: Thank you for reading. Thank you for following and favoriting. Thank you for reviewing. Please continue to let that stuff happen. So, I think this might go on a little farther. I don't know how far really, just more than I originally intended. It may just be never-ending fluff. But I think we can all live with that, yes?_

_Happy reading!  
_

Chapter Four

I drove Jill to see Adrian the next evening. Thankfully Eddie and Angeline were in the middle of training when we left. And both said they had homework to finish, so it was just us. I sat in the kitchen doing homework while the other two worked quietly in the living room. I tried not to pay attention, but the sound of Adrian's voice always drew me out of whatever I was doing. There were a lot of moments of silence and concentration.

"Hey, Sydney?" Adrian said after a while.

I looked up to see him standing at the end of the table. I smiled. "Yes?"

"Are you hungry? I was going to cook."

"You were going to cook?" I asked, giving him an incredulous look.

"Yeah, you got a problem with that?" He said with a teasing challenge in his eyes.

I chuckled. "I just didn't think you had the ability."

"So you think painting is my only talent?" He looked hurt. "I can do other things." He walked closer and leaned toward me. He murmured. "You know I can."

I looked over his shoulder. Jill was nowhere in sight.

"Bathroom." He said in explanation just before he pressed his lips to mine. "I'm sorry about last night."

"Last night was great." I protested. "All of it."

He sat down beside me and took my hand. "I'm going to see what I can do to get you that vacation I promised you. I think when we go to the wedding you should be able to get away. You aren't necessary with so many guardians around." He rubbed the back of my hand with his other one. "That didn't come out the way it was supposed to. I'd love to have you there."

"I know." I squeezed his hand. "But I would love the chance to see my family in a non-work capacity."

He leaned down and kissed my hand and then stood. He walked over to the fridge and started pulling out ingredients. Jill walked in a moment later.

"So what are you making?" Jill asked, leaning against the counter as he worked.

"Lasagna." He explained as he broke up ground beef in a pan. "Would you be a sweetheart and cut up some onions?"

Jill took the onion from him, found a knife, and went to work.

"Did you make the noodles yourself this morning?" I teased. I closed my books. No point in going any farther.

He chuckled. "No, I didn't." He took out a pot and filled it with water. "I'm cheating a little." He waved a jar of pasta sauce around. "Shortcuts, you know. I'm not Julia Child."

I laughed. My mother used to watch old Julia Child shows. "Is there anything I can help with?"

"Salad?" he asked.

"I can make a salad." I gathered the rest of the vegetables and began chopping. "So how did all that stuff go?" I asked, indicating the living room.

"I think I'm making progress." Jill said. "Which will come in handy for studying for my winter exams. Sometimes even when Adrian's just painting, I'm pulled in unexpectedly. I need to be able to only jump into his mind when I _need_ to."

"Makes sense." I said.

"Too bad I don't plan on dying again." She said with a wry smile. "That would close the bond for good."

"Would you miss it or be relieved?" I asked. We never really talked about this. I never felt comfortable with either of them one-on-one, but with both there, it was easier.

"It's nice having someone there on the other end." She said softly, pushing the pile of onions away. But I'd like to have my mind back."

"I'm sorry, kid. But I like you." Adrian said, taking her onions and adding them to the browned meat. "And we need you. Not because you're the last Dragomir, but because Moroi numbers are so low."

"I know." She said.

"So why are you fooling around with me?" I asked without thinking. I paused what I was doing. I looked at both of them.

"Because I like you." He said. "Lissa and Christian can further the Moroi race." He shrugged. "If it goes the way I…" He trailed off and looked away. I saw a blush moving up his neck. I didn't realize vampires could blush.

Jill giggled. "Should I go in the other room?"

"No." we both said at the same time.

Adrian put noodles in the boiling water. "Let's face it, I'm hot. I could have my pick of Moroi and Dhampir alike. But I don't want the easy ones. I like the challenge."

I said nothing else, though I could. Like how it wasn't much of a challenge when the girl in question came over throwing herself at you. But I didn't. I didn't think it was right for me to flirt with Jill in the same room. It didn't matter that she was in on this secret. It didn't feel right.

Jill chattered on about school and her friends for the rest of the time. Adrian assembled the lasagna and made cheese bread. Jill and I watched from the table. When he was done, he sat down with us and put his hand on top of mine.

I was self-conscious for a moment and then turned my hand over and wrapped my fingers around his. Then my phone rang, taking me out of the moment. "Eddie." I said, pushing the talk button. "Hello?"

"Are you and Jill okay?" he asked, his voice tinged with worry.

"Yeah, we're with Adrian. They were working on some blocking exercises and now we're about to eat dinner."

"Oh. Okay."

"They can join us. I'll go pick them up." Adrian said. He stood and headed for the hook by the door that held his keys.

"You want to come? Adrian says he'll come get you."

"Yeah, I'll get Angeline."

Adrian walked over and said, "Tell them I'll meet them by the girls' dorms."

I relayed the message and hung up.

Adrian came over to me and brushed a kiss over my lips. "I'll be right back. Lock the door behind me. Don't let the food burn."

"I won't." And, ignoring Jill's presence, I pulled him in for one more kiss.

I looked down at my hands. Jill followed him. I heard their whispered conversation, though I tried to ignore it.

"I could just go." She whispered.

"We already invited other people over, Jill. I can't make up a good enough excuse."

"I just want to help, Adrian."

"Thank you, but you are doing all you can already. I'll be back in a few minutes."

She locked the door behind him and then returned to the kitchen. She checked the food in the oven and then turned around and watched me. "You know what he was going to say when he stopped himself, don't you?"

"Adrian is a romantic." I said. "I know what he was going to say."

"I've seen his dreams."

I nodded. Then I said, "No offense, Jill, but I don't feel comfortable talking about this. I'm still trying to figure it out myself."

"I understand." She pulled the bread out of the oven and turned it down so the pasta wouldn't burn. Then she retreated into the living room and turned on the TV.

I took a pop out of the fridge and joined her. "I'm just so new to this." I said as I took a sip.

"Yeah." She turned. "But you like him, right? You're not just playing around?"

"I like him." I assured her.

"Good." She turned back to the TV. "Because I don't know how I could handle that heartbreak again. I didn't want to hate Rose, but I had a lot of hurt and distain for her for a long time because of what she did."

"You can't help who you love." I argued.

"Yeah. But it still hurt. She was at a point where she thought Dimitri was gone forever. And then she just jumped right back to him as soon as he was better."

She sounded so bitter and jaded for someone so young. But it was understandable after what happened. And Jill was connected to his emotions and thoughts. She knew just as well as he did what heartbreak felt like.

"I'm going to try really hard not to hurt him." I promised. "I'd hate to hurt either of you."

"I'm glad."

We watched TV for a while until the others arrived. We had a lovely family dinner together. I had never played house as a child, though I understand it's a game a lot of little girls really like to play. But I felt then that we really were playing that childhood game. I was the mom and Adrian was the dad and the other three were our children. I smiled at the thought wistfully.

"What's that smile for, Sage?" Adrian said from the other end of the table.

I shook it off. "Nothing. Just enjoying the good conversation and good food." I indicated the plate. "You're not so bad. We should do this more often."

"Yeah, we should." He smiled.

At the end of the meal, Eddie and Angeline volunteered to wash dishes.

"I need a cigarette and some fresh air." Adrian announced.

"That makes no sense." I said. "You're actually polluting the air."

"Would you like to join me?" He asked, leaning close.

"Well, as much as I hate the smell of slow death…" I smiled and followed him out the door.

He stood there for a moment and then motioned for me to stand on the other side of him before he lit up. He blew the smoke away from me.

"Thanks." I said, leaning back against the wall. "I was pretending in my head we really were a family." I said after a while.

"Is that so?" he said on an exhale of smoke. "Mommy and Daddy and our three dysfunctional children?"

"They're not dysfunctional."

"Well, incestual at the very least."

I smiled. "They come by it honestly."

He chuckled and took another drag. "So, is that the first time you've ever thought of it?"

"Not consciously."

"I have." He admitted softly. He took another pull from his cigarette. "But I have a lot of time to think." He flicked ashes away. "But I…I shouldn't have it."

"And why is that?" I challenged. "Why shouldn't you want that? Why shouldn't you get it?"

He turned his head and looked at me. "What sort of future could we have? We have to hide this now. What are we going to do if we decide we want more? It could ruin your life."

"And yours." I looked away, not wanting to see the intensity in his eyes. "I promised Jill I'd try not to hurt you."

"I started this with you knowing that it would end eventually."

My eyes shot back to him. "It doesn't have to end. We'll just keep it a secret until we know Jill is safe."

"That could take a while."

"I know."

"Well, then what?"

I shrugged. "Maybe I'll tell my father I don't want this life after all."

"What about your sister?"

"I don't know."

He stubbed out his cigarette and waved away the last of the smoke. Then he pushed me against the wall. His hands rested against the wall on either side of my head. He kissed me softly. "I don't know either."

I put my hands on his chest. "Zoe wants this life. I don't."

"Then let her have it. You're still young enough to go to school and become an architect."

"Not if this takes forever." I pushed him away. "We need to get back to Amberwood."

"I wish you could stay."

"Me too." I walked back inside to see that the others were finishing up with the dishes. "Thank you, Adrian, for having us over for dinner."

We all bid Adrian farewell. Jill took my keys and headed out to Latte with the others trailing behind. I kissed Adrian behind the closed door and then left, wishing I could just rush back into his arms.


	5. Chapter 5

_Author's note: Thank you so much for all the love, you guys. I'm going to keep working on this for a while. There might be time jumps eventually. I have visions of lovely things. Even some special guests walking in on something. It will be lovely._

_Anyway, happy reading!  
_

Chapter Five

Adrian called Jill a few days later. "How do you feel today?"

"Fine. Why are you calling instead of texting?" she asked.

"I want to hear your beautiful voice. Is that so wrong?"

"I don't guess so. What's up?"

"How do you think the block exercises are going?"

"Fine. I've been working on it all week when I was studying."

"Good."

Jill asked suddenly. "Are you going to sleep with her?"

_That's unexpected._ Adrian sputtered. "Well, I don't plan on it anytime soon. She's better than that."

"Good. I was about to say that."

"Yeah."

"I've been privilege to your imaginations." She pointed out.

"What does that mean?"

"You want to marry her."

"Haven't you ever fantasized about marrying a guy you like?"

"Yeah. All girls dream about their wedding at some point."

"Well, guys can do that too." He paused. "I just want to have a private conversation with her and not have to worry if you've been listening in."

"I understand. But I wouldn't say a word."

"You're a good kid, you know that?"

"Yeah, my mom tells me that." She chuckled. "I like talking to you, Adrian, but I really need to get back to my homework."

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow when we go to the feeder."

"Okay."

Adrian stared at his phone for a few seconds and then he called Sydney. "Hey. Can you come over?"

"Not tonight, I've got a ton of homework."

"Do it over here. I want to see you." He begged.

"Adrian, if I come over there, all you're going to do is flirt with me and touch me until you have me on my back on your couch."

"You make it sound so sordid, Sage. I just want to see you. I'll sit in a corner and paint and you can do your homework."

"I have a curfew."

"You're an adult."

"Yeah, but they don't know that here."

"You're getting your things together, aren't you?"

"I'll be there in a few minutes." She said, just before she hung up.

* * *

I had actually started getting my things together as soon as Adrian had requested it. I could do this work in my sleep. And I could finish whatever I didn't do tonight first thing in the morning. Most of what I planned to work on was stuff due in a few days' time anyway, so I didn't really have to do it. I put that stuff back.

I hurried down the steps, not getting scrutinized, thankfully. I stopped off to get coffee before completing the trip. Adrian opened the door for me when I walked in. He stepped to the side and motioned me through the door and then he took my hand and kissed it.

I smiled and shook my head, "You're ridiculous."

"I know." He led me into the living room and we sat down on the couch together.

I pulled out my homework and started on it.

Adrian leaned into me and kissed my neck.

"Hey!" I said, pushing him away with a giggle. "You said you were going to let me do my homework."

"That was before you got here and I realized how much I've been missing you." He kissed my neck again.

"I'll let you kiss me if you let me finish this. I have a few more problems to do."

He made a face. "Math."

"Yeah, well, it's kind of your fault I have to be stuck back in school."

"How is it my fault?" he asked.

"Out of a big chain of events, I choose you to blame because I like you the most." I met him the last few inches and kissed him.

He smiled and pulled the book off my lap. He placed the paper and pencil in the crease and closed it as he sat it on the coffee table. Then he pulled me on top of him as he reclined on the couch.

I pushed myself up. "What are you doing?"

"Letting you take over for once." He said, running a hand up my side.

I smiled. "I need to finish my math."

"Kiss me for a while first. You have hours."

"I also have reading for my English class."

"No doubt a book you read already."

I leaned down and kissed him. Then I said against his lips. "One hour."

"One hour kissing or one hour until all your work is done?"

"One hour until all my work is done." I sat back up and pulled my book back onto my lap.

He sighed. "Fine." He sat in the opposite corner of the couch and watched me.

The silence was lovely. I never thought silence could be so comfortable. I turned and stretched me legs out, resting my feet on his lap. He took it as an unintended cue and started massaging them.

I sipped my coffee occasionally and shared smiles with Adrian. It felt very domestic. I sat my finished homework and empty cup on the table and crawled to the end of the couch. I cupped Adrian's cheeks and gave him several soft kisses on his lips.

He stretched out and pulled me on top of him once more. One of my hands tangled in his hair while the other caressed his cheek and slid up his arm where it wrapped around my waist. I shifted it up higher when it dipped a little too low.

I resumed the kiss and the caresses as he slid his hands up and down my back. I felt him fiddling with my bra. I broke the kiss. "Excuse me, that is _not_ happening right now."

He smirked and moved his hand away. "Just testing my limits."

"And that's the limit." I said. I rested my head on his shoulder.

He ran his fingers over my spine. "We never do this." He said softly.

"No, we don't."

We were quiet again. We breathed the same breath. My finger drew lazy circles on his shoulder as his fingers continued their journey up and down my spine.

"I like this." He said finally.

"Me too." I said around a yawn.

"You'll get in trouble if you don't get back before curfew."

"I know." I pushed myself up and kissed him softly and then sat back.

"Could we maybe…have a talk?"

"About what?"

He hesitated. "Sex."

I was shocked by that. It wasn't what I expected. I thought maybe he wanted to talk about what we should call our relationship. But not that. I got up and filled a glass with water from the pitcher Adrian kept in the fridge.

"I'm sorry. Never mind." He lit a cigarette.

I sat back down beside him. "I don't want to do it. I mean, I do. But not any time soon."

"And not with me?"

"I wouldn't mind it being with you." I said shyly. "I've just never really thought about it. Not in terms of anyone. I've always been so focused on other things."

Through all of this, he smoked heavily on his cigarette. "I think about it a lot."

"Well, you're male. Men of your age crave it more than women. Women crave it more when they're older." I was rambling. We both had our ways of dealing with the awkwardness.

He stubbed out his cigarette and blew the smoke away. "Forget I even brought it up." He got up and started pacing.

"I want to." I said. "But I always thought I'd wait for a while if I was ever with someone. That's not something I just want to throw away. And if we get to that step while we're here, it's even more likely that we could mess up somewhere."

"Yeah." He said, combing his fingers through his hair. "I could use a drink. This is so awkward."

"Why is it awkward? You've done it before, haven't you?"

"Yeah." He stopped and looked at me. "Most of them…except Rose…"

"Okay, I know once she enters into the conversation—"

He cut me off. "I loved her Sydney. I thought we had something."

"Then what do we have?"

"I'd like to think that the slip-up I had at the movie the other night wasn't much of a slip-up."

"Like I'm your girlfriend?"

He shrugged and reached for another cigarette. "Not if that's not cool with you."

"I don't know. I don't think that's a good idea."

He put the pack away without lighting up again. "Yeah."

I stood up and tugged on his arm. I pulled him back onto the couch. I kissed him. "I like you. I like this. And I don't want to move any farther than what we have right now. At least for the moment."

He nodded and kissed the back of my hand. "Lay with me here for a little while longer?"

"Sure."

We stretched out on the couch again. This time I rested my ear over his heart. He played with my hair as I listened to its beating.

"I bet it will be great if we ever get to it." I said after a while.

"It _will_ be." He agreed. He kissed the top of my head.

"And you would know because you've done it."

"Not with you. Every girl is different. But you've got a lot of pent-up passion that I'd love to unleash."

I turned my eyes into his chest.

"You're so amazing." He whispered huskily.

I chuckled. "Are you seriously trying to get me all hot and bothered?"

"Is it working?"

I laughed. "Only a little. I have better willpower than that." I sat up and smoothed down my hair. "I need to get going."

"May I visit your dreams tonight? I haven't done that in a while."

"As long as you promise the dream walking will be this moment." I kissed him and then gathered my things. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow." He echoed.

He walked me toward the door and we shared several more kisses before I finally was able to make myself leave.


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's note: So I decided to go ahead and write another chapter even thought I have some reading I want to get done. lol. Thank you for all the reviews and favorites and alert adds. I appreciate them very much!_

_To the reviewer who claims Sydney is using Adrian, I personally think that it's kind of going both ways if there is any "using" going on._

_There is a poem in here that is called "A Dream, a Dream" and it is written be Matthew Petranovich. I found it online. _**I don't own it in any way.**

_Happy reading!_

Chapter Six

The weeks passed in pretty much the same manner. No more talk of sex came up, but Adrian's touches became more adventurous. I halted them as much as possible. I was actually starting to like them.

Adrian set up my flight to Utah to leave on the same day as their flight to Court for Sonya Karp and Mikhail Tanner's wedding.

"You're flying first class. Only the best for my…Sydney." He smiled at the near slip.

"It's too much, Adrian. I can fly coach."

"This is my first gift. I know the flight will only take a couple hours, but you deserve luxury."

I chuckled. "That makes me feel like you're my sugar daddy."

"Anything you want, baby." He said with a cocky grin.

I shoved him playfully. We were sitting on the couch and he pretended to lose his balance and pull me on top of him.

I kissed him as I giggled and then I sat back. I sobered. "Look, I really appreciate that you set this up, I don't want a first class ticket. I don't care that you think I deserve it. From all you say, you're barely getting by, even with your allowance back. Is there some way to change it?"

"Non-refundable. Enjoy it, Sydney."

"Adrian…I don't know what to say?"

"You don't have to say anything." He pulled me into his side and kissed my temple. "And anyway, I've got the money, it's just tied up."

"Tied up?"

"Yeah, investments. And I've been working on this for a while. You've helped me in so many ways. So that's why you deserve this trip."

"Do you know the price tag involved in this? Now I owe _you_." I felt distressed.

It must have sounded in my voice because he said, "Don't worry about it, Syd."

"Did you just call me 'Syd'?"

His cocky grin was back. "Yeah. Since I can't call you my girlfriend."

"I've never been called that. Either one."

His face fell slightly. "You don't like it."

"I don't know." I patted his knee. "We'll have to see." I kissed him. "Just a couple more days."

"Yep. So, let's make the best of it." He pulled me on top of him again.

I smiled as I pressed my lips to his. As our mouths moved together, I slid my hands down his sides and back up. His fingers played at the hem of my shirt and I slapped his hand away. "Stop that." I said against his lips and then continued to kiss him.

He smiled in the kiss and did it again.

I took his hands and pinned them above his head. I knew he would normally have been able to break out of it, but he didn't. I raised myself up a little and smiled down at him.

"You know, I've always wondered what it would be like to be tied up." He said, smirking up at me.

"You're deranged."

"I've never done it. We might like it."

"I'd like more than just an immobile plaything." I released his hands and lowered my mouth to his once again.

He put his hands on my hips and kept them there. I ran my hand down his chest.

And then there was a knock on the door.

"Are you expecting someone?" I asked, a little breathless.

He shook his head and got out from under me. I smoothed a hand over my hair and clothes and watched as he peeked out to see who was there.

"Rose?"

I shot to my feet. "Rose? Here? Why? Oh, my god." I hurried into the bathroom and locked myself in. I splashed water on my face and looked in the mirror. My lips were swollen and red. I couldn't cover it up with lipstick. I didn't wear any. I sat down on the toilet and fought hysteria.

After a while, there was a knock on the door. "Sage?" Adrian called. When I didn't say anything or open the door, he knocked again. "Come on, Sydney, open up or I break in."

I unlocked the door and opened it enough to invite him in. I sat back down.

He closed the door behind him and kneeled in front of me. "Hey, don't freak out." He put his hands on my knees and rubbed them gently. "I think that's my job."

I let out a nervous chuckle.

"They're going to be staying here. They'll escort us to the airport."

"So Rose is the head guardian with the transport?"

He nodded. "With Dimitri and another guardian. Since it's so late, they're crashing here. They're going to meet with Eddie and Angeline tomorrow to discuss particulars."

"They should have told me it was _them_. All I knew was three guardians."

"Yeah, same here. Seems Lissa wanted the best to escort her sister home."

"Well, she got them." I leaned my forehead against his. "Did you explain my presence?"

"Yeah, I told them I had you naked. I was pretending to paint you, but really just gearing up to ravish you."

I pushed at his shoulder. "Not funny."

"Then why are you smiling?" He rubbed his knuckled on my cheek. "I told them we were talking about the final particulars of the vacation Jill and I set up for you."

"Do they know? About us? Has Jill said anything?"

"She promises me she hasn't."

I nodded. "I need to make my excuses and leave."

"Don't leave me alone with them." He begged.

"You're not alone. The other guardian is here." I gave him a weak smile.

"I wish you were." He said softly.

"Me too." I leaned in and kissed him and then stood and left the bathroom.

"Hi, Sydney." Rose said kindly.

"Hello. Did you have a good trip?" I asked as I gathered my books.

"Pretty good, yes. Were you studying here?"

"Yeah. I like to get away from Amberwood sometimes. It's quiet here."

I could see she was thinking of asking about a library, but she had a bit more tact than that. She knew. I could tell. It was written all over her face, but not in an accusatory way. She smiled.

I smiled back. "I need to be going."

A man walked in. He was broad and had dark features, an odd contrast to his red hair. He seemed pretty young. "Everything looks in order, Guardian Belikov."

"Thank you, Branwell. I'll be taking first watch."

"Watch?" Adrian asked, indignant. "I live here without incident on my own. There is no need for a watch."

"Hey, calm down, Adrian." I said. "They're just doing their job."

"Weren't you leaving?" He asked uncomfortably.

"Yeah."

"I'll walk you out to your car. Knowing the perimeter is clear, it should be safe. But better just be sure." He took my arm and walked with me outside. He pulled out his cigarettes as soon as the door was closed. "I wish I could still drink." He took a long drag as soon as he lit up.

"Yeah." I looked around nervously and then headed toward my car.

He stopped me and pulled me back. "I'm sorry. I should have done this before lighting up." He said before he kissed me.

I sighed.

"Go back to your dorm and get to bed early. We'll finfish all this in your dreams." He smiled slyly.

"I look forward to it." I kissed him quickly once more and then got into my car.

* * *

I lay awake for a long time before I was finally able to drift off. As soon as I did, I was transported to another place: Adrian's. He sat on the couch with a book in his hand. He smiled and started reciting, "_A dream, A dream,/another dream./A dream of you,/A dream of love,/A dream of you and me,/we had such chemistry,/If only you could see./A dream we danced in the moonlight,/A dream we made love til the mornings bright light,/A dream, A dream,/Where my true feeling burst,/A dream, A dream/Makes me feel more hurt./A dream, A dream,/of true love,/over and over,/over and over,/A dream, A dream/where we are together,/A dream, A dream,/why can't it be real,/A dream, A dream,/where really connect,/A dream, A dream/that I can't reject,/A dream, A dream,/and another dream,/Why can't it be real?/Why can't you love me?_"

I stared at him for a while before I finally said, "Poetry? Really?"

"I can't be poetic?" he asked, placing the book on the kitchen table. He stretched his arms out on the back of the couch. "Come here often?"

I chuckled and sat down beside him. "I like the poem, by the way. But not the last line."

"Why not?"

"Because it's not that I can't."

"Of course it is." He draped his arm over my shoulders and pulled me close. "Because of how your life is. Your upbringing."

I didn't say anything. I leaned my head on his shoulder and relaxed into his side. I wrapped my arms around him and felt the realness of him in this world he fabricated. Finally I said, "I think I could."

The fingers that had been playing along my arm stopped suddenly. "What?"

I tensed. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No." His stroking resumed. "I think I could too."

"Lay back?" I asked.

He did, pulling me against him. He stroked my hair. "I'm going to miss you."

"Me too."

"Bring back some good stories."

"I will. My mom's really excited. I'm already planning on helping her in the shop for an afternoon."

"Get your hands dirty?"

"Yeah."

"Sounds hot."

"Not really. By the end of the day, my hair's a mess and my skin is grease stained. And I love it."

"Which is what makes it hot." He chuckled and kissed my hair. "Will you look under the hood of my car sometime?"

"Is it making funny noises?" I asked. That was usually what people said about their cars when they came in to see my mom. We usually made fun of the ones that went on and on trying to describe what they heard including sound effects. I'd told Adrian this before.

He laughed. "I think it's a belt issue. I know a little about cars, but not enough. And I'm a good assistant. I can pass you the scalpel."

I laughed. "I'll look at it when I get back."

He played with a strand of my hair for a while. I was getting used to the silence. I liked it with him.

But finally he broke it. "Our flights are supposed to get back at the same time. If not, I'll make arrangements."

"Okay." The magic broken, I looked up at him. "I kind of do need my actual rest. I have a giant conjuring project I have to work on with Ms. Terwilliger tomorrow. Not looking forward to it. I wish you and I could do this for real."

"Me too. Maybe on the other side of all this travel we can figure something out."

"I like that idea." I kissed him.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah." And then I drifted off to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

_Author's note: Thank you so much for reading this and for the reviews. I'm so glad you like this. I think we really are nearing the end. I might to a Future!Sydrian fic soon to make up for it._

_Happy reading!  
_

Chapter Seven

Adrian and I shared our goodbye kiss in a dream the night before the trip. I woke up with the feel of his lips still lingering on mine. I lay there for a while, rubbing my fingers over my lips and thinking about how much I was going to miss him.

My phone went off and I looked at it to see a text from Adrian. "_Missing you already._"

"_You're being overdramatic._" I got up and dressed for travel.

"_Whatever, it's true._"

"_Okay, so it is. But you can't talk like that. I have to delete these messages._"

"_Right. Sorry your dad will be around there._"

"_I am too. But I'll make the best of it. Hide in Mom's shop._"

"_You do that._"

"_And you're going to imagine me with my face smeared in grease?_"

"_Oh, yes! Hot!_"

I didn't have time to reply. I rolled my suitcase out to meet the others. We all piled into the giant SUV Dimitri had rented when he arrived with Rose and Banwell. I ended up in the back seat with Branwell and Adrian. The latter reached for my hand and I jerked it away.

"No." I said sharply under my breath.

He sighed and looked away.

"Now you're mad at me, aren't you?" I asked quietly, knowing all the others in the car could hear.

"No." He said just as softly.

I pulled out my phone and opened up my texts. I deleted all the ones from Adrian and any other texts from Eddie, Angeline, and Jill that seemed too friendly. I knew there might be a chance my dad would see.

Parting with everyone was easy. Even Adrian and I, though we shared a lingering look, parted with ease. I sat in my seat and was given a note. "_I ordered something special just for you. Perks of first class and my savings. –A._"

I looked at it in confusion for a while. What sort of special "something" could he have prepared for me? There was no meal on a two hour flight and I couldn't drink, even if I wanted to. I settled into the extremely comfortable seat that I didn't deserve and called my mom who was going to pick me up at the airport.

"I'm on the plane." I told her after we exchanged greetings.

"Okay, I'll see you in a couple hours then?"

"Yeah, a couple hours. I love you, Mom."

"I love you too, sweetie."

Then I sat back and listened to the safety drill. When the plane was finally in the air, the flight attendant came up to me with a smile and handed me a small cup of gelato and another note. "_Enjoy it, Sage. I'll see you in a few days. –A._"

I smiled and ate the gelato slowly, trying not to think about the calories.

* * *

Being in my mother's presence was comforting. For once in a long time, I felt free.

"Where's Dad?" I asked as Mom and I settled into work in her shop for the rest of the day.

"He's been away on business, but he never tells me where. He doesn't know you're here yet. Your friends who set this up said not to say anything." Mom examined the inner workings of an overused farm truck. "So how do you like it?"

"It's fine." I said as I handed her a wrench. "How are Zoe and Carly?"

"Carly is seeing someone. She won't say much more. Zoe is working hard." She smiled warmly. "She told me she wants to be just like you."

I smiled bitterly. "That's just lovely."

"It can't be that bad." She worked for a while and waited patiently for me to go on. When I didn't she climbed out from under the hood and looked at me critically. "What is it?"

I shrugged. "I think…our system's flawed. And…I just want more than what I'm supposedly destined for."

"These people we work for, the ones we're protecting everyone from, aren't as bad as they are made to be."

"Then help them to see it." She went back to work. "You're the next generation, Sydney. And you're bright. You can work to change it, little-by-little."

"At the risk of re-education?" I leaned over the engine with her. "No thank you."

We didn't say anything else the rest of the day. We worked well together, helping one customer after another on projects as small as oil changes and tire rotation to changing out a water pump at the end of the day.

Mom and I cleaned up and headed home.

Zoe came in and smiled. "Hi, Sydney."

"Hello, Zoe." I pulled her to me and hugged her tight to my chest.

She hugged me back and then pushed at me gently. "You smell like the shot."

"Then I guess that means I need a shower." I said with a chuckle and walked out of the room.

* * *

"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be working?" My father asked sharply as soon as he walked through the door and saw me.

"Everyone's entitled to a little vacation, right?" I asked timidly.

"Not when the world is in danger."

"They're working on it." I pointed out as we all sat down for supper.

"And are _they_ keeping their distance?"

"I'm keeping them in line." I said.

Not that it did much good to ease his nerves. He scowled at me over his plate and waited for my mother to finish putting the dishes of food on the table. He said a blessing before we dug in. Then he looked at my plate as I filled it with meager portions, even for me.

"I don't suppose that's how you've been eating since you've been away." He said, after she swallowed a bite.

"Jared." My mother tried to scold, but he went on.

"Look at her, Sheryl." He went on. "How are you supposed to keep up with them looking like that?"

I looked down at my plate and then smoothed a hand over my stomach. I pushed my plate away. "Thank you for ruining a perfectly good day." I mumbled as I got up from the table.

I went to my old room and sat down on the bed. I felt the urge to talk to Adrian. I pulled out my phone and looked at it for a minute. I pulled up the contacts menu and scrolled to his name. I was just about to push the send button when there was a knock on the door.

"Yes?" I called as I quickly put the phone away.

My mother opened the door and walked in. She sat down beside me and I wrapped my arms around her and buried my face in her neck as I used to when I was small. I hadn't cried in a long time and I didn't now. I just breathed her in and put my thoughts in order.

I sat back and smiled at her. "Thanks, Mom."

"Any time." She smoothed a hand over my hair. "Please come down and eat."

"What Dad said—"

"Your dad is under a lot of stress, Sydney."

"He's _always_ under a lot of stress." I looked at my phone. "There's a guy…"

"Ah, a guy." Mom smiled knowingly at me. "I thought so."

I felt myself blushing. "He, um, he likes me a lot. And I like him." I stood and started pacing, putting the phone away once more. "He likes me for who I am. And I was starting to feel…" I shook my head and shrugged. I gestured toward the door. "He doesn't know the damage he's done."

"I know."

"He takes it out on me."

"No, he doesn't."

"Yes, he does. And you know it. And you let him."

"I don't _let_ him. I fight for you girls every day. But you know as well as I do that no matter how hard you try, he's going to get his way somehow."

"Carly got out."  
"She did. And if you decide you want to leave, then I will stand behind you every step of the way." She stood and placed her hands on my cheeks. "We work well together. You could always come and help me." She kissed my forehead. "Or whatever you wish for, sweetheart."

"Thank you, Mom."

She smiled. "Now, come on. Supper is getting cold."

"I'm not hungry."

"Would this guy of yours approve of you skipping meals?" she challenged.

I blushed again. "No."

"So come back down."

"I'll be right there." As soon as she left, I sent a text to Adrian, "_Can I call you in a few hours?_"

His reply came immediately as I was going down the stairs. "_You can call me any time. Everything okay?_"

"_No. More later._" I replied and then deleted the thread.

* * *

I snuck outside after the house was quiet. I sat in my mom's car in the garage. I was freezing, but I didn't care at that moment. I pulled out my phone and dialed Adrian.

"Sage! There's a party going on over here!" He said when he answered. I could hear music in the background and mingling voices. I heard a catcall and Adrian shushing the person.

I laughed. "Have you been drinking?"

"I've had a couple. But I promised Jill I'd pace myself. I'm on my first glass of water."

"Good. I guess." I said. I ran my hand over the steering wheel.

"So tell me what's not okay." He asked. I could hear the sounds of the gathering receding.

"I thought I would be fine with my dad here, but I don't know if I can."

"It's just a couple more days. Spend time with your mom and sisters."

"Yeah, but he's always _around_ when he's home." I rested my head on the steering wheel. "I wish…I want to stand up to him."

"So do it. Or I can come out there and do it for you."

"That would work out _so_ well. You come here and tell off my dad. And then he'll get upset mostly because you're a Moroi, but also because he'll know that you're my…Adrian."

He chuckled. "Just say I'm your boyfriend already. It makes all this so much easier than 'that guy that I like who has an ugly couch that we make out on sometimes'."

I laughed. "Yeah, but I'm not ready for that."

"I know. But can I call you my girlfriend?"

"Stop with the drinking, Adrian. I'm not your girlfriend."

"Just so you know we're only a few steps away from friends with benefits."

"Well, when we start getting closer to that, I'll say you're my boyfriend. Right now, you're still that guy that I like who has an ugly couch that we make out on sometimes."

He laughed. "I like the sound of that."

"I need to go. I'm working with my mom all day tomorrow." I paused. "She offered to let me come home and work with her if I decided to leave the Alchemists."

"That's good. I'm glad. Are you going to do it?"

"I'm not even going to consider leaving until this assignment is through."

"It could still take a while. There aren't many good leads here, from what I understand."

"Let it take as long as it has to. I like what we are. I'm in no rush to change any of it."

"Same here, Sydney." He said softly.

"Go back to your party. I have to get to sleep."

"I, um…Goodnight, Sage."

"Goodnight, Adrian." I sat in the car for several minutes after the call before I finally made myself go back into the warmth of the house.


	8. Chapter 8

_Author's note: Thanks again for all the love, guys. I wasn't sure if this would get written because I'm kind of on a vacation, but my friend and I are chilling in the hotel room tonight as he just drove all day. So it did get finished after all. Yay! Anyway, please feel free to review and let me know what you think._

_Happy reading!  
_

Chapter Eight

I spent a lot of time with my mom and avoiding my dad, just as I had planned. But on the last night, Dad called me into his office. He was sitting at his desk, looking over a file when I walked in. He didn't look up, just told me to have a seat.

"What is the status of your assignment?" He asked, still not looking up.

"Everything is going as it should. No one suspects anything is amiss with my charges."

"Is the _Keepers_ girl behaving herself?" he said with disgust.

"Yes. She's learning a lot in her training with Eddie—Guardian Castile. And Miss Dragomir is doing well and keeping a low profile."

"Excellent. And the other Moroi boy? Ivanov?"

"Ivashkov." I corrected. "He's very protective of Jill, so he's around a lot."

He finally looked up. "How unfortunate."

The look on his face made me fear that I had said something too telling. I swallowed and willed the blush to leave my cheeks. "Yes. It's proven quite easy to put the fear at bay while I must. I just keep my nose to the work and know that such close proximity won't last long. Have you heard of any leads on their side?"

"None. At least not anything promising."

I nodded. "Well, if that's all, I have an early flight in the morning." I stood tentatively.

"Right. Goodnight. I'm leaving for an assignment myself tomorrow. Trying to get prepared." He indicated the founder in front of him. "I probably won't see you in the morning. Keep to your good work, Sydney." He looked back down and went back to his studying.

I left without another word. Zoe was in her room studying. Carly was out with her boyfriend. The house was quiet. I went to where Mom sat in the living room. She read a book in one corner of the couch with her legs curled underneath her. She looked up and smiled as I settled on the other end.

"I'm going to miss you." She said softly.

"And I'll miss you, Momma." I curled into her side. I hadn't called her that since I was tiny, but I needed to. I needed her. Never in my life have I felt so unready to leave home. I'd been prepared for the inevitability all my life. I wanted to go back and fight harder so I could stay home and all this complication with Adrian would never have happened.

My phone started ringing. I took it out and looked at the display, "_Adrian_" it read.

"Is that the guy?" Mom asked, her eyes going from the phone to my face.

"Maybe." I smiled and ignored the call. "Mom, why did you marry Dad?"

"Because I loved him, of course." She said with a chuckle.

"No, I mean, because you're not like him. How did you even meet? You've never told me."

She smiled at the memory, "It was on one of his assignments. His car messed up and he ended up in my dad's shop. I was struck at first by his perfect looks. And then I noticed the tattoo on his cheek." She brushed my cheek that held the lily tattoo she was talking about. "I was fascinated by that. But he was evasive about it when I asked." She looked a little ashamed. "I looked under his hood with my dad and I loosened a bolt. It wasn't anything major, but it would mess the car up again. And when it did, he came running back to us." She giggled. "And that was it. We were both hooked."

"Even after you found out about the Alchemists?"

"Yeah. I thought it was a good organization the way he described it. I thought it as necessary. But he's never here." She smoothed a hand over my hair. "And they took you away from me far too soon."

"What would happen if I…?" I moved away. "Never mind."

"No, sweetie, what is it?"

"The guy…" I looked down at my phone, the text tone sounded. "He's different. Very different. And I don't think Dad will like it much if it goes any farther and he finds out."

She whispered, "He's one of _them_, isn't he?"

I bit my lip and looked away. Her approval was more important to me in that moment than my father's had been in all my life. Then I felt her arms wrap around me and all the fear melted away as I returned her embrace.

"It'll be okay." She said to me as she rocked me back and forth in her arms.

"I'll have to leave the organization." I said against her shoulder.

"Change from the inside." She reminded me.

"There aren't enough people that would want to, Mom." I looked at her. "Could I really come to work with you?"

"Yes."

"What about Dad? And everyone else?"

"We'll deal with them."

I let go and stepped away. "I can't do this. Not really. It's a nice dream, but there's no way out. Not easily."

"I'll support you in everything, Sydney. You know that." She assured me.

"Yes." I looked down at the phone. "It's getting late and I have an early flight."

"Tell him I say hi. And that he should call me so I can get to know him."

"It's not that serious, Mom."

"Of course it's not." She winked and then yawned. "I guess I should go to bed too. I'm the one driving you." She kissed my forehead.

We walked together out of the living room. She paused outside my dad's office door and knocked.

"Yes?" He called, sounding irritated.

She made a motion for me to wait as she called, "Going to bed, dear."

"All right." He said shortly.

She looked like she wanted to say more, but didn't. She wrapped an arm around my shoulders and we walked up to my bedroom together. She kissed my forehead once more and then pulled me into a hug.

"Get plenty of sleep. I'll make pancakes in the morning."

"That sounds good. Thank you."

"Zoe is coming with us, remember?"

"Yes, I remember."

"Well, that is if your father doesn't decide he needs her along to shadow him on this latest trip.

"Has he been doing that a lot?"

"Not a whole lot." She shrugged. "It just feels like you all over again."

"I'm sorry."

She put her hands on my cheeks. "It is not your fault, Sydney. Don't ever think for a minute that I blame any of this on you."

"I know." I said softly. I wrapped my arms around her. "Goodnight, Mom."

"Goodnight."

I went into my room and looked at the text I'd ignored while talking to my mom. "_Call when you can._"

"Hello, beautiful." He said when he answered.

"Hi, Adrian." I said. I wonder if he could hear the relief in my voice. I liked hearing him talk. I missed him more than I realized. I really wished I could run to him the next day at the airport like they do in the movies. But I knew it was useless. "What's going on?"

"I just wanted to talk to you. Tell you goodnight."

"You'll see me tomorrow." I said, changing as I talked. "I don't see the big deal." Though I actually did.

"I miss you, Sage. It's what people do, you know, when they…like someone."

"You were going to say that other 'l' word weren't you?" I lay on my back on the bed.

"I was about to. Then we'd both freak out and I wouldn't be able to kiss you again for a while."

"You're pretty smart, you know that?" I teased.

"I do what I can."

"I can just picture that adorable cocky grin on your face right now."

"Did you just call me adorable?"

"I think I did."

"Then I guess I'm obligated to tell you that I think you are the hottest woman I've ever met."

"Yes, that's definitely an obligation when you're dating someone." My breath caught right after I said it. Why had I said it? What would his reaction be?

"Yeah, dating. Which would require _not_ making out on my couch and actually doing stuff together."

"You want to stop the make-out sessions?" I challenged kindly.

"No, I don't. But I'd like to cook with you again. Just us. And then we can cuddle on the couch and watch TV."

"I like the sound of that. We should plan it for next week."

"Yeah, let's do it." He sounded enthusiastic.

"I'll have to make up an excuse."

"I'll help you come up with one." He paused. "I like you, Sydney."

"I like you too, Adrian."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"I forgot to thank you the last time we talked. For the gelato. That was sweet."

"I wanted to do it."

I fought a yawn. "I'm tired. I'll see you." I hung up a moment later and rolled onto my side. I fell asleep quickly.


	9. Chapter 9

_Author's note: So I've been preparing and working on National Novel Writing Month since the last update. I put the prologue and first chapter up on fictionpress if you'd like to read it. It's called Curious Clockwork and is posted under the pen name Danielle Cheri._

_ I think it will be a while until I get to do another update and I also think that this probably only has one or two more chapters. So thank you for taking the time to read and review and put this on your favorites and alerts._

_Happy reading!  
_

Chapter Nine

Adrian was waiting for me at the airport. I smiled and walked up to him, standing with just a foot between us. He took my bag from me, our fingers brushed. He leaned close, looking as though he wanted to kiss me. He straightened up suddenly.

"Come on. I'll let you drive." He said, turning and heading out the door.

"What was that about?" I asked.

"We're in public, Sage." He put my things in the trunk of his Mustang and tossed the keys to me.

"Where to? Your place?" I teased.

"I wish. Rose and Dimitri escorted us home. They're staying an extra day."

I grimaced. "So how did all of that go?" I started the car and headed out of the lot.

Adrian passed over the ticket and money to pay for the parking. "I've been in more awkward positions. Not much more, but it was bearable. More so since I had you waiting for me."

I smiled at the road ahead and shifted gears as I got on the highway and was able to speed up. "I love your car."

"I could buy you one."

"I thought your money was tied up in other things. Didn't you spend all of it to get me home?"

"Not all of it. And this month's check came in, so I'm all good."

"Good enough to buy me a car?"

He smiled. "Not entirely. But I could put a decent down payment on one."

I shook my head. "You're trying to buy my affection, aren't you?"

"No, if course not." He leaned over and rested his hand on top of mine. "Is it working?"

I laughed and shifted again. I pressed my foot down on the gas.

His hand moved up my arm and then back down to my hand. "We could go to a hotel or something. Maybe a movie or a museum or somewhere that's dark so I can kiss you for a little while."

I felt my cheeks heating up. I wanted that too. I'd missed his lips moving over mine over these last few days. I pulled off the highway and into an empty parking lot. I put the car into first and turned off the engine. I leaned over a little and put my hand at the back of his head.

"What are you doing?" He asked, looking at my lips.

"Giving you a chance to kiss me." I crooned.

He met me over the center console. His mouth pressed against mine. I could feel that he wanted to pull me closer as his hands moved hungrily up my arms and then down my back.

I sighed, opening my mouth enough to invite his tongue to play with mine for a few lovely seconds before I pulled away.

He groaned and pulled me back for another kiss. "Come over tomorrow?"

"And what?"

"Kiss me. Lay with me. Let me hold you and tell you all the things I want to do with you."

"Sexy things?"

He nodded. "And boring, mundane things." He cupped my cheek.

"Are you daydreaming about a future again? You know we can't have it." I moved back into the driver's seat and started the car up again.

"We could. We'll find a way."

"And what would we do, Adrian, if we _could_ find a way? If we married and had children, what would they do? I won't have them become Alchemists and I don't know if I could send them off to become fighters. I commend Rose and Dimitri and Eddie for all they have to do for you and Jill and the other Moroi, but I can't let my children do that."

"We don't have to have children. We could be one of those couples that have fur babies."

"I'm allergic." I said, sighing. "We just can't. And we're both too young to be thinking like this anyway."

"But I want to, Sydney. I want to think about it. Because I love you. There, I said it." He turned toward the window and stared out it.

"You can't." I said softly.

"I _shouldn't_, but I do." He placed his hand on top of mine again after I shifted. "And I keep seeing the signs in your aura that you love me too."

"Stop. Please, just stop." My heart was racing and I was having trouble breathing. I pulled over to the shoulder and rested my head on the steering wheel. "This isn't happening."

"What?"

I looked over at him. "I can't jeopardize everything I've worked so hard for, Adrian. I just can't." I wiped angrily at the tears streaming down my face.

He remained silent and when I looked over to him, I could see he was just as distressed as I was. "This is hard for me, too, Sage." He rubbed his hands on his thighs. "I don't want to ruin all this either. If we slip up, Jill could die. I can't go through that. I never had anyone I cared about the way I care about her. And I've never loved anyone the way I love you."

"Rose—"

"Was nothing compared with you. Yeah, I loved her. But only because somewhere in the back of my mind I knew she was something I couldn't have, no matter how hard I tried. She was always Dimitri's. You may work for the Alchemists, but they can't control who you love. Maybe you can't admit it or you don't want to, but your heart doesn't belong to them."

"No, it doesn't." I slipped my hand into his and squeezed. "But I can't leave them. Not now or ever. This isn't something I can just quit."

"So don't. Change the way your people feel about mine. Not all of them are cold and heartless. We've proved that together." He kissed my hand.

"That's not as easy as you make it sound."

"I know. But I'll help you, bab—Sydney."

"Were you about to call me 'baby'?"

"Maybe." He watched me for a while. "Would you like it if I called you that?"

I drove toward Amberwood. "I like it when you call me Sydney."

"And I like to call you Sydney." He rubbed his hand up and down my arm.

* * *

I didn't realize how much I had missed spending time alone with Adrian until I was once again. He pulled me into his arms and kissed me again and again. I trailed my fingers up and down his sides. I tentatively curled my fingers under the hem of his shirt.

His breath caught in his throat and then he breathed out, "Sydney."

I pulled my hands away quickly and apologized.

"No, don't." He grabbed my hands and put them back on his waist. "Please don't stop touching me." He kissed me again and smoothed his hands over my hair and down my back.

My fingers again ventured under his shirt. I touched his bare skin and felt his breathing quicken. I kissed him and whispered, "Is this okay?"

"Fine." He clamped his mouth on mine and pulled me against him.

I slid my hands up a little farther and placed my palms on his back.

Adrian's phone rang, breaking the silence. "That's Jill." He pulled it out of his pocket and hit the talk button. "I'm sorry, Jill." He said in greeting. "Well, are you focusing?" He brushed a hand down my back as he continued the conversation. "Keep trying. I know you have a ton of things going right now. If it doesn't work, then we'll practice again tomorrow." He leaned his head against mine. "I know. I'm sorry, Jill, I really am. We'll talk later." He hung up. "The block isn't working." He kissed my forehead and stepped away.

"She told me she had a lot of catching up to do." I sat down beside him on the couch.

He pulled my legs over his knees. "But no need to stop just yet. I told her to keep trying." He kissed me again, holding me close.

I once again slipped my hand under his shirt and rested it against his stomach. He moaned softly and put his hand under my shirt, stroking my back with his fingertips. I pulled back and looked at him a moment before leaning down and kissing along his jaw and down his neck.

He chuckled and leaned his head back on the couch. I kissed back up his neck and then pressed my lips to his once more. "Was that okay?" I asked.

He kissed me again. "Of course."

"I've just never done it to you before."

"Don't be nervous. I like it." He repositioned me on his lap so that I was straddling him.

I put my hands on his chest and sat back. "What are you doing?"

He didn't say anything. Instead, pulled his shirt off over his head and then pulled me to him once more. He closed his eyes for a while.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Trying to calm down my mind and emotions so I don't pull Jill in."

I moved my hands over his chest and stomach. I'd never touched another person's bare flesh, much less a guy's. I sat back and looked at him.

He looked back. "You don't have to take your shirt off, but I'd enjoy it if you did."

I laughed and leaned down to kiss his shoulder. "Not happening."

"Not going to stop me from doing this though?" He asked, putting his hands back up my shirt.

"No, you can do that. Just don't move any further." I kissed his shoulder again. "What's the rest of it like?"

"My body or sex?"

"Both." I wrapped my arms around him and breathed him in. "Tell me what to expect."

"Expect that when the time is right, it will be as good as I can make it for you." He kissed me. "The first time is awkward and it may hurt quite a bit, but I'll do what I can for it to be comfortable."

"Can you really promise that?"

"I can promise to try. I've done this a few times."

"You don't sound very proud of that fact."

"Not when it comes to you." He slid his hand farther up my back. "I like you a lot, Sydney. I liked what I did with those other girls, but not the way I think I'll like it with you."

"And why do you think that?"

"Because making love to you will be something different then just having sex with a girl for the hell of it." He kissed me. "Connection _and_ pleasure. I look forward to it."

"You'll have a long wait." I kissed him. "I need to go."

"So go." He wrapped his arms around me and lowered me onto the couch.

I laughed. "Nice try, but I really do have to go. I left all my homework in my room."

"So what? You already passed all those classes."

"Yeah, I did. But we've had this conversation before." I lifted myself up and kissed him. "Let me up please."

He kissed me once more and then he sat back and put his shirt back on as I gathered my things. He pulled me to him at the door and gave me a lingering kiss. "I love you, Sydney."

I smiled up at him. "Good to know."

We shared another kiss and then I left. Maybe I should have said it back.


	10. Chapter 10

_Author's note: So, my lovlies, this is the final chapter. I feel like this is a good place to end this, but I promise some more one shots. Maybe even some sexy ones. Look out for those._

_Thank you for all the follows, favorites, and, especially, reviews. I appreciate it and I hope this has met your expectations.  
_

_Happy reading!  
_

Chapter Ten

"_I thought you said you'd be here by 5._" Adrian's text read.

"_Running late. Ten minutes._" I replied.

"_Hurry_."

I shook my head and looked in the mirror one more time. I had dressed in a blue blouse Adrian had said once he liked on me. I smoothed my hand over a wrinkle and then headed for the door, pulling my purse strap over my shoulder.

Thankfully Jill had roped Angeline and Eddie into a long study session. She and Angeline had an exam and Eddie said he was very good at the subject. I claimed needing to study for all my other stuff and that I just wanted to be alone. I said I'd probably go to the coffee shop to explain my absence from campus.

I hated lying, but it was essential if I wanted to spend time alone with Adrian. I had my books with me, but of course I wouldn't be opening them. I knew the material like the back of my hand. I would pass easily.

I pulled in behind Adrian's mustang and hurried to the door. He answered and pulled me in hastily. I smiled and turned him, pressing him against the door.

He chuckled as I pushed myself up on my toes and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around me and held me close as we kissed lazily.

"I was starting to worry." He said against my lips.

I kissed him and then stepped back. "I got held up by Terwilliger. I'm sorry." I breathed in. "What smells so good?"

"Coq au vin. I wanted to be fancy. Should be done in about an hour." He kissed me and then walked into the kitchen. "But in the meantime, I have bruschetta." He brought over a pan of bread topped with the tomato salad. "Please just eat one, Syd. At least. I chopped tomatoes for hours."

"You wouldn't have chopped them for hours." I said, reaching forward and taking one. I took a bite as he took one of his own. "This is good."

"Thanks." He sat the pan down and took my hand. "Let's have a seat." He led me into the living room where two glasses and a bottle sat on the coffee table.

"Adrian, I don't drink."

"It's sparkling grape juice." He poured out two glasses and handed one to me.

I took it as I sat down. "Thank you. This is nice." I took a sip and sat back. I finished off my bruschetta. "Is this low calorie?" I asked, looking at the glass of juice.

He leaned toward me. "Will you make me a promise tonight?"

"What promise?"

"Tonight, don't worry about the calories and the fat and the sugar. Just eat your fill and don't feel guilty about it in the morning."

I looked around me before I was able to look at him. "You know how hard it is for me."

"I do. It's like you punish yourself. Sydney, you're not like us. No matter what you do, you can't be us. And that's perfectly fine. You look ill. It worries me. I'm falling in love with you and I'd like…" He took the glass from my hand and put it and his on the coffee table. He took my hands. "I'm not telling you to stop watching what you eat. If you want to be thin, be thin. But there's a difference between thin and anorexic."

I rubbed my thumbs over the backs of his hands. I could feel tears filling my eyes. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my eyes into his shoulder. "I can't."

"Can't want?" I could hear the strain in his voice.

"It's so hard, Adrian. I want to be perfect."

"For who? For your father or for yourself?" He pushed me away slightly and cupped my cheek. "If you can't do any of it for yourself, it's pointless."

I wiped at the moisture on my cheeks.

"I stopped drinking because I knew it was hurting Jill and upsetting you. And I knew that it was time. I did it because you make me _want_ to be better. I'm asking you to do this because I care about you. But if you don't want to do it for yourself… I mean, don't try and fail because it's what _I_ want."

"I'll try tonight. Take it one day at a time."

He leaned forward and kissed me softly. "That's all I ask."

I pushed him back on the couch and rested my head on his chest. His arms came around me, holding me, making me feel secure. I put my arms under his shoulders. We lay there silently. His hands smoothed over my back.

"I like this." I said after a while.

"I do too." He kissed the top of my head. "I could be like this every night for the rest of my life."

"I could too." I closed my eyes and listened to his heartbeat and breathing in my ear. I was completely relaxed for the first time in a long time. I was almost asleep when an alarm went off in the kitchen.

We both groaned as Adrian moved out from under me. I sat up and smoothed my hair down. I watched Adrian for a while as he took a pot from the oven and then went to work putting the last of the meal together.

I walked in carrying both our drinks. "Can I help with something?"

"There's a lighter in my pocket. Will you light the candles?"

"You expect me to reach into your pocket?"

He thrust his hip out and shook it. "Come on. I know you're not going to do anything else. You're not that kind of girl."

"I could be." I walked up behind him and rested my hand on his hip. "I'm just reaching in for the lighter." I slipped my hand into his pocket and grabbed the lighter, taking it out quickly. "Okay. Done." I turned and walked over to the table.

I heard Adrian clear his throat and then take several deep breaths. I looked over my shoulder. He busied himself stirring something and then he took the pot off the burner and excused himself for a moment.

I lit the candles and walked over to the stove and stirred the pot. I was already thinking of all the sacrifices I'd be making in meals for the next few days as I looked into the thick sauce. Then I shook my head. I had never vocalized my promise, but I had decided not to worry about what I consumed tonight.

Adrian came back a few seconds later, a reassuring smile on his lips. "Sorry about that."

I shrugged. "No problem."

"I wanted to go out for a cigarette, but you have my lighter." He placed his hands on the side of my face. "And a good thing too, because if I had smoked, I wouldn't be able to do this." He pressed his mouth to mine, leaving it there for several seconds. He pulled back and smiled. "Have a seat."

I sat down—he pulled out the chair for me—and waited to see what he had planned. He brought the pot over and filled both our plates. And then he rushed over and shut off the lights. He came back in with the bottle of juice and sat down. He filled both our glasses.

"So, let's see how this turned out." He took a bite.

It was delicious. I had never eaten something so rich without any care as to what I'd have to sacrifice later. Tonight was for enjoyment. We talked softly, mostly just catching up. We talked a little about our childhoods.

"I never felt like I mattered. I was just something to throw money at." Adrian said after a while. "I know my mom loves me, but dad… he's different."

"Maybe we got the same rotten luck when it comes to parents." I commented.

"Maybe. But I plan on being a better father. I owe it to my kids and to myself."

I put my hand on top of his. "I think you'll be amazing."

"Thank you." He turned his hand over and curled his fingers around mine.

"I… I can picture a family with you."

He smiled and brought my hand to his lips. "What would your answer be if I asked you to marry me?"

"It would be no. For now at least."

"If I ask you again when this is all over?"

"I don't know. I can't see into the future. This could get messy. I don't want to make a promise I can't keep."

"Okay." He kissed my cheek. "I have something special planned for desert."

"I don't think I could eat another bite."

"You'll want this." He tapped my nose with his finger before he got up. He cleared the plates and then came back to the table with two bowls and spoons and then sat a carton in front of me. "Gelato." He announced.

I smiled. "Are you going to expect that at our wedding?"

He smirked. "It's fewer calories than any other desert I could have made or bought." He scooped some out into each of our bowls and sat down again. "Dig in."

I ate a few small bites. I was full, but I didn't want to be rude.

"So do you think you _would_ marry me?" he asked after a long silence.

I stirred the frozen treat around in my bowl for a while and then took another bite. Finally, I said, "I think so."

"So can I get a rain check?" He asked softly.

"We'll just have to see."

After desert, we blew out the candles and then walked into the living room and stretched out on the couch the same way as before supper. This time I did doze off for a while. I didn't realize it until he whispered my name.

"You have to get back before curfew."

I kissed his neck and then sat up. I stretched. "Thank you for supper. It was great. Do you want help with the dishes?"

"No, I got them. You go on back before you get in trouble." He took my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. "I love you."

I smiled and kissed him. "You won't hear it from me for a while."

"I know. And that's fine. There's no rush in any of this, Sydney. None at all. I told you I'd wait for you. It that takes a year or ten, then I'm fine with that. Just know that I do love you. Very much."

I nodded and kissed him again. "You're sure about the dishes?"

"I am."

He walked me out to my car and kissed me again before I got inside. I rolled down my window and he leaned in to kiss me again.

"We could just go back inside." I teased.

He kissed me once more. "Yeah, but then you'd get in trouble and be confined to your dorm and I wouldn't get to see you."

"I'll see you tomorrow, Adrian."

"I can't wait."

He finally stepped away and I drove away. I watched him light a cigarette in my rearview mirror.


End file.
